Saturday
December 4
Madame requires that Gwen present herself as a maid and perform certain duties for the day. The uniform will be that of an Victorian serving maid with a somewhat short skirt. It is a satin uniform with a high lace topped collar, worn with a black petticoat, an apron trimmed with white lace and a oval, lace trimmed head piece with two white ribbons in the back. The foundation is a black, restrictive Victorian corset with black stockings and black ruffled panties. The shoes are the five inch black patent heels with the wide ankle strap. The recording of the day’s activities will be still photos and video.My first assignment was to practice the curtsy. Put your right foot behind the left foot and bend the knees, which is different from a bow from the waist. Lower the head in deference to a superior. This seems simple enough but doing it in heels was quite difficult. The curtsy also turned into more of a bow. The practice lasted about twenty minutes with only small progress in getting the technique correct.
The second assignment was to perform basic maid serving duties. I practiced with a silver tray carrying a tea service and then a wine bottle and glass. The practice involved carrying the tray with both hands and then one hand. As I practiced walking it was difficult to keep the tray steady. I slowly got better as the practice lasted about half an hour. During this assignment, Madame instructed me to never straighten or adjust my uniform. Once in service, the uniform must be proper and not adjusted in any way. Any failure in the way the uniform is worn would result in discipline.
Overall, this presentation proved much more difficult than I thought it would be. More practice is necessary to become a better serving maid.
Saturday
January 8
Last month, Madame made an interesting suggestion. Would I think about the ways in which Gwen was changing and that perhaps I was losing control of her. All of this begins many years ago when I found myself standing in front of the full length mirror of the bathroom door. In the mirror I am wearing a girl’s gymsuit. For some time, I had watched the girls in their gym classes and somehow wondered what I would look like in their place. I didn’t know it then but Gwen would now be in my future.
Gwen resulted from my interest in those magazines I found depicting bondage and discipline. Those magazines (like Atomage) were British and featured women as the subject of the bondage. Shortly afterward, I also discovered the work of John Willie and his heroine, Gwendoline. What I realized, was that as I looked at the photos I put myself in the place of the heroine and not Sir Darcy. Slowly, I began to construct a Gwen for myself. This led initially to some foundation wear and dresses. It also led to thoughts (and actions) about makeup, jewelry and wigs. I was strongly attracted (as with the gym suit) to retro foundations and maid uniforms. Over time, several Gwens emerged. The first was Maid Gwen. Victorian, Edwardian and Modern uniforms as well as hobble maid. The second was Pink Gwen. Lots of frilly dresses, pink foundations, bonnets (some influenced by the artwork of Barbara Jean in black and pink), foundations and uniforms. The third was White Gwen in terms of foundations. An attempt to go back to Gym suit Gwen resulted in several bubble rompers. Gwen also made sure that she could appear in a variety of black, red, and blue outfits. The foundations were mostly 50s retro in terms of high waisted panty girdles, open bottom girdles, bullet bras and various one piece bra and girdle (panty and open). All of this was accompanied by various accessories to complete the look.
Gwen was proceeding nicely until she discovered a place on the net called Stepton. She discovered a poster, “Could This Be You” and a reference to “Sissy Studies” and the Stepton Academy. Curious, Gwen sent an inquiring email. Some days later, she received a note from the Head Mistress of the Academy. She recommended that Gwen read the Stepton Retro Society, Life In Stepton (Part One) and the Stepton Volunteers. After that if still interested, Gwen was to detail her interest. Gwen wrote back about the possibility of becoming a long distance student in the Academy. Madame responded that Gwen would be accepted for training on a provisional basis. The first requirement was to post her wardrobe and accessories for Madame to consider. Madame instructed that from now on whatever Gwen did or wore would be left to Madame’s complete discretion. Gwen would accept assignments and would follow directions to the letter.
Some months later, Gwen has begun to realize that she has now lost control of what she wears, what makeup and accessories she uses and what activities she undertakes. Is she willing to give up this much control? In preparation for a maid assignment, Gwen suggested that black oxfords would be the appropriate shoes. Madame reminded Gwen that what she wanted to wear was not relevant and to follow the assigned wardrobe.
So far, the process seems worthwhile and exciting as she learns and develops a new dimension of who she is. Gwen is now entering a future where she is slowly becoming sissy gwen.
I have requested that Gwen prepare a journal entry on her feelings when she goes for a long period without being able to dress as Gwen.
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